I didn't make time to go see my Mom on Mother's Day. My time off work was limited on Sunday and I filled my day running around with my son doing errands. At the time, I thought those things were more important to get done first and I would see her later. Before I knew it, I had to go back to work and didn't get to see her. Now, I feel terrible about it.
I think my Mom thinks I don't want to spend time with her or that I don't love her. The truth is, it's really hard for me to be around her because all the pain from her life weighs so heavily upon her. I feel partly responsible for some of that pain. I wish I could take it all away from her and tell her that it's ok. Everything is REALLY ok.
I love my Mother. She has been the only light in life at times. The only person who could tell me it was going to be alright. A person who has loved me unconditionally.
She keeps telling me that time is running out between us and that we need to be spending more of it together. I want to, but I can't and I'm not completely sure why.
About Me
- Sublime
- Oblivion, Midwest, United States
- At age 41, overcoming some of my biggest fears has granted me periods in my life of supreme respect for the grand plan of the universe. Unfortunately, I’ve learned I have the idiotic ability to forget some of the huge lessons. Luckily, my cosmic fortune cookie never seems to mind having to repeatedly tell me things until I get it! My favorite foods include Easy Cheese, shelled & salted peanuts, red-pepper hummus and pizza in any form. I’ve realized I never really quit smoking; I just stop for periods of time. I no longer cry over spilled milk. I recently figured out that I do so much better when I’m not going in ten directions at once. I’ve also been hit with the realization that I’m never, ever going to find happiness outside of myself – it has to come from within. The true meaning of this came to me during meditation, at which point, I literally gave MYSELF a hug. Finally, I know if tomorrow comes then more change is inevitable and embracing is easier than resisting it.
7 comments:
As painful as it may be for her, I'm sure that she understands how it is. I really do believe that. It's a life process of growing up and moving into our own lives away from our parents / grandparents, and they were there once as well. They know how it is to be raising kids, working, having friends, keeping a house... and as much as we hate to admit it, family often gets taken for granted. I struggle with the same things, and try to do what I can to squeeze everybody in, but sometimes I just have to console myself that they'll understand eventually. Kids, now... they take priority over parents because they DON'T understand or have the life perspective that our elders have.
That's just my two cents. Your mileage may vary, but I'm hoping to assuage some of your guilt with this comment. Send her some flowers or an "I love you / I'm sorry" card. Or take her out to lunch in the next couple weeks. It'll be okay.
Right on Toady Joe that was beautiful and so true.
Take care
chris
Pick up that phone...
You are gonna hate yourself when she is gone.
GEt off you ass, extend yourself, and as Nike says...Just Do It.
STB
Hey, how ya doing?
Thinking bout ya.
The only constant in life is that time goes by and we can't get it back.
I agree with those who say call her- you will be filled with a lifetime of regret if you don't. If you feel responsible for some of her pain, relieve her from some of it by stopping by to say hello.
-AM
Hi I wondered in here from Sassyfemmes place.
A little bit of advice, try and make time for your mom, god forbid but when she is no longer around, you'll regret not seeing her on Mother's Day and any other day, trust me. I lost my mom in Feb of this year and how I wish to god I could of sent flowers on Mother's Day this year.
Just make some time cos You'll never get that back :-)
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